Below is an exceedingly rough and unpolished extract from something I am writing at the moment. It's basically using fiction as an excuse to discuss philosophy and the folly of seeking perfection. Let me know what you think. Would you read it? Maybe not these words specifically, but the idea? I hesitate to give too much away but it's not a criticism of religion, rather of being human, and shouldn't be taken too seriously.
"Oscar Berger wasn’t entirely sure whether it was the unfortunate accident involving the tram and icing sugar or whether it was the chimney that broke from his house and injured a neighbourhood cat that had finally steeled his resolve. Or maybe it was being retrenched from the newspaper during a period when there was more news about than ever before. They told him it was to consolidate their reporting interests but, to be honest, Oscar felt very much like he had been cast aside. This was, in fact, the exact opposite of consolidation and he knew as such because he had pilfered a tattered copy of his style guide which would be of approximately zero further use to him.
Everything had been ruined. Certainly the cat would never look at a chimney the same way. And so it was there, beneath the imperfections of a jacaranda tree that had mistakenly grown sideways, that Oscar decided to put all of his concerns into one stern letter, seal it and then hand deliver it to God himself. He would sit him down for a long, severe chat and respectfully inform him that there had been some mistakes.
Some oversights. Of course, they could all be redressed with some proactive mediation and possibly a new chimney. Writing the letter was the easy part (and very satisfying being able to vent about the state of roads even though it was a request more appropriately directed to his local government authority and not God) but finding the apparently Almighty was a whole other battle of wits and he hadn’t the faintest idea where to begin.
So he began on Albert Street, where shop owners once reported seeing the face of God (or a very convincing stunt double) in a particularly delicious pudding."
If you write about God, chances are your book is going to be a bible.
ReplyDelete(And no, I'm not sure what that meant either, but I think it's a compliment).
xxxxx
Oh dear, I thought you meant it was going to be a bit stuffy! It's not reeeeaaallly about God per se, the main character just thinks it is. But it's what he discovers along the way, I suppose. Oh bother, I haven't the faintest idea what I am doing.
ReplyDeleteCan't wait to read the rest. Get cracking son!
ReplyDeleteI like it, but I think that's because I enjoy your writing style and the ideas are a bonus. My reader is so full that I was going to skip away, but caught the first line and was hooked. So that definitely worked for me :-)
ReplyDeleteDo it for the sake of mankind, I reckon it will be a cracker! and it's just right up my ally, exactly what i'd read.
ReplyDeleteIn the meantime, i would like to harvest your brains so that i may, one day, have a fifth of your writing ability.
Good work, Rick
Well, you've caught my interest too, and there's cricket on the TV, so that shows it's an interesting story.
ReplyDeleteThanks guys, if you're being honest *skeptical eyes* And Guy C...*blushes*
ReplyDeleteI may be biased but I would read a shopping list that you wrote.
ReplyDeleteWill you autograph my copy when I buy your bestseller?
I love it and I want...nay, I DEMAND more. Chop chop Rickstar, as you well know, I find your writing style magical. I love your quirky humour and will eagerly await a signed first print run edition of your book. x
ReplyDeleteI also want more! I found your blog through your comment on the Pink Fibro blogoversary blog, and love it. Best of luck with the competition, and the story.
ReplyDeleteThank you darling Lana, and dearest Wafflecopter. And eeeek, Rose, wow, thank you! *Frantically looks busy*
ReplyDeleteHey Rick,
ReplyDeleteYes I would definitely read it - sounds great and "here here" to the instructions to get cracking!
oh you are in SO much trouble — this could be the stupidest thing you have EVER done, given us the merest SNIFF of something delectable.
ReplyDeleteall i can say is, every time i catch you procrastinating, putting off the writing of this beautiful book, i will chop off your fingers one at a time.
so get cracking, or start learning how to tweet with your nose …
I love this! It's like The Man Who Sued God meets Two Weeks With The Queen. I would definitely read it. The final sentance made me laugh.
ReplyDeleteMate, when a book is bouncing around in yer noggin' and Life keeps getting in the way of it coming out, you need a challenge.
ReplyDeleteFriend of mine in the US emailed me one day and said I'm a pussy if I can't write 6,000 words a week for the next 2 months. Challenge born.
We're just starting the next one, which is more along the lines of 1500 words a week minimum and when you type "The End", you win.
And by "win" I mean "no prizes, you just won't be called a 'pussy'".
Email me if you're interested, it's fun and I've found amazing inspiration and feedback in weekly threats via electronic mail.
Good luck on it regardless, it has what ALL good writing should have, a great opening. I'm hooked.
You're good value Judd. You're right. I think I need to sit down and just bash it out. Can always refine it later.
ReplyDeleteTa buddy.
ReplyDeleteBashing it out is precisely the idea mate. I know not the actual numbers but will fake it and tell you that 92% of all novels began (at least with an opening) are never finished.
Gettin' 'er done is a HUGE step. Then give it to strangers to read (me and the pussy) and we'll critique the work not the artist. Then you make revisions to it until your inner perfectionist can sit down (or at least lean on a doorframe) and then start sending it to agents.
For seriousness, I've only been reading this blog for a short while, but you're excellent and have talent and The Universe will put sharp things in your pants and/or nether regions if you don't do something with said talent.
I mean it too. Email me, myfirstname@mywebsite, and I'll motivate you towards a book. I promise not to call you "pussy" too... it'll be far, far worse. Heh.