You know what I meme?

So here’s the thing. The fabulously lovely Stacey aka Veggie Mama and I should, by rights, have nothing in common. I’m an unmitigated carnivore and a terrible cook (you could ask people to vouch for this but they died of food poisoning) and she’s quite the marvel in the kitchen and she eats plants. Which is totally cool, because I like plants. I even put them in my food sometimes.

But we like each other. I’m learning to broaden my cooking horizons and she’s apparently getting something out of this too though I can’t for the life of me imagine what. Check out her stuff and follow her on Twitter, she's adorable.

She’s awarded me an award. Which is, coincidentally, the exact thing you’re supposed to do with awards. It’s called the Stylish Blogger award which, I’ll be honest, made me laugh like a drain because oftentimes I look like I’ve been dressed by a cyclone.

As part of the deal I’m going to reveal 7 things about myself. Starting with my left nipple. No, no, I misunderstood. I will reveal seven things about myself that aren’t my most odd physical attributes. Those who know me well will probably already know these. So here we go.

1. I play the ‘fat jogger’ in a music video for Data Rock’s Fa Fa Fa single. You can YouTube it because I am far too busy and lazy to embed the video here. Apparently I wasn’t originally fat enough for the role so a very pretty lady who was unfortunately not a very pretty man had to stuff my red tracksuit with pillow lining, including various rearrangements near my crotch. Showbiz, you complete me.

2. I cannot whistle. This virtually ruled me out of a career in the construction industry.

3. I’ve been fined, fined, for jay-walking. This is about as close to a 1920s Broadway experience I will ever get.

4. I was school captain at my high school. I cling to the remnants of its power still.

5. I once fought off a dingo attack with the thigh bone of a dead cow. I’m like a cross between Bear Grylls and Peter Allen.

6. My favourite ever book is The Little Prince. If you have never read it, do yourself a favour and go do so now. It’s very short.

7. I am so not stylish. I know what I like but I don’t know how to wear it. This pretty much makes me the worst homosexual in all the world. The worst.

So that’s the hard part. Now for the hard part. Picking some bloggers to pass this along to. The original number was 15 but I can’t process that amount of information so I’m going to do four.

Movie Mazzupial: Written by my real life uber awesome friend Maria, this is your one stop shop for insane movie news and insight with all the quirk of Maria’s stunning involvement in the subject.

So Now What: Bern. What can I say about her? She writes honestly and with a delicious economy and my favourite thing of all: swear words. She might work with numbers but she works magic with words.

Life and Other Crises: Kerri knows how much I love her work. I imagine you do too because I think the only people who haven’t heard of her are the Amish and Simon Baker. Which is a shame, really. She’s also going to be a real life author! Wicked.

Matt Granfield: I discovered Matt’s work recently and so have the ABC it appears. Little wonder because he writes with a wit and clarity and intelligence rarely seen. I sincerely love his stuff.

Honestly people, you don’t have to play the meme game and pass this on or anything.

But anyone reading this should definitely check out those sites.

Good, it’s settled.